“Are you putting your life on hold – until your piles of clutter are gone or the laundry is folded? Don’t. Figure out what you want to achieve and move toward it.”
Whether you have ADD or not, take a minute and check out the creative ideas from ADDitude magazine. This quote is from an article by the wonderful Sari Solden, a leader in helping us understand how ADD affects adult women. I’m currently re-reading her classic, Women with Attention Deficit Disorder: Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life.
Her article this month, “Reach for Your Stars,” applies to all of us who have a small, medium or large issue with our stuff, our clutter — whether it is in our home, on our desk at our office, or within our calendars and schedules.
I want you to reflect on the question above as you go through the next few days, because I have heard many women make this same sort of statement. “I can’t have fun until …” “I won’t allow myself xyz until…”
Here’s a specific set of questions
to figure out an answer
to the big question above.
Think about answers to these questions and you will arrive at what you want, to focus, achieve it and move towards it.
What is organized enough, to you?
What do you know about what you want?
What do you most value about yourself, your relationships, and the nature of your work? Values, needs, priorities right now. If we can connect your organizing goal to one of these, you’ll find it’s easier to get motivated to start, stay on track and maintain.
What has worked well in the past? Build on past successes because if it worked, it’s partly because you created a system tuned to how you think. You knew how to work with yourself.
What gets in the way of your home being as organized as you’d like to be?
When your home is organized the way you’d like it to be: How are things easier? How will it feel or look? What will you say to friends? This is sometimes a difficult one until after we’ve started organizing. And for some people, it’s hard to visualize the “new picture.” If so, describe the energy, or the smell or taste of something that reminds you of your future, or talk it through with someone else. (Smell or taste might sound like: “My home feels like when you’re sitting on your beach chair, eating your favorite chocolate, with a glass of your favorite wine … and you’re all by yourself.)
What immediate change would make the biggest impact to your current situation?
A few of my favorite ideas from Sari’s article:
Mix into each day a little bit of time on something which nourishes your spirit or enhances your strength. My comments: This reminds me of a dieting and budgeting adage: don’t completely deny yourself. Reduce, so have one bite of the chocolate cake, just not the whole piece. You’ll stay far more motivated to keep on the diet or the budget — or on the decluttering goal!
Meet other women in person or online who have similar challenges. My comments: Nothing like community to know you are not alone, and to share your ideas and solutions with others as they share with you. I love when I give a class or a presentation and the group members start to assist each other. All kinds of options. Moms with ADD blog/community. My Facebook organizing page or newsletter. Fly Lady. Think about what it is you want out of the community and then look for it. So many options. If you want advice or other options, please contact me. These are each different. Or, just dive in anywhere.
Find a person who sees you clearly… and will help you make small moves. Counselor, coach, support group member, friend. My comments: Start somewhere. If you are already seeing a therapist, ask what else you can about this. Seeing a business or life coach to create your next chapter? Ask to explore the topic of organizing. Sometimes the coach can support; other times, he/she may refer out to a local Certified Professional Organizer(R).
If you have significant decluttering issues in your opinion, then check out the chronic disorganization specialists with the NSGCD (yes, I’m there, too). If you believe you have a hoarding issue, there are specialists listed with the NSGCD or if you’re not seeing a therapist, start there first. You’ll probably want collaboration among those in your support community. We all do, to some extent, don’t we.
Like my picture of the goat on the edge, let’s figure out what we want and move forward, back up the cliff of rocks to where we want to head, instead of teetering in between. Let’s move forward, okay?